KC25 Reflection by Shekainah, USEP Mintal

There is beauty in brokeness this is the description of my relationship with God before I entered KC.

I am a pastor's kid, so althroughout my life I am told to be a leader in such a young age. So my perspective of being a leader is the one who delegates tasks to others, assist others to become effective, be with them in times of struggles and vulnerability and always please people in all of my ways. As young as I am pressured to give my all to become a leader who makes no mistake.

But as human as I am, I fell into temptation and sinned against God. I also was once held captive, broken and mourning. I taught that my ways of coping with the pain was good, was healthy but in reality it was the greatest destruction of my life. It lead me to distance myself from God, I listened to my ways, that I taught were right, I seek answers, assurance, comfort from people whom I taught were genuine, who has the intention to help but in the end I was wrong, those people whom I ran to left me, betrayed me and didn't even see me as a friend in the first place. I was hopeless, I was lost, broken but it didn't end there, I kept on repeating the same cycle even though I am well aware that it will cause me great pain. Because of being self righteous, self dependant it caused me to break the broken pieces of my heart.

Then, He came, He made me feel the love that I was looking and yearning for. He showed and made me realize that even in brokeness there is hope. He taught me that even if transgressions were so cruel, I am still worthy to be loved. Despite my imperfections He still loves me deeply, as I journey in the world full of chaos there He was waiting for me with open arms saying "Come, I am here and always will be here" and that captivated my heart leading me to become deeply in love with Him. I fell, I was ashamed but then He came and made me feel the unconditional love no one can ever replace, in Him I found Shalom.

Here in KC God revealed to me that being a leader is not merely leading the pack but as a leader we are their representation in Christ, the one that intercedes between them and God. And at the same time we are the representation of God's love to them, that by our lives they will be able to feel and see how God deeply loves them. How gracious God is to them and that He will always be with them no matter what. Through our lives God will be able to work in their lives and they will be able to discover the unconditional love God has for them. And we should not take ministry as an obligation, but see ministry as a commitment, a worship and thanksgiving to God for all the wonderful and great things He has done

To my fellow leaders, let us lead by example to them. May our life reflect the goodness and faithfulness of God. Let's walk our talk. That even in the simplest things that we're doing they'll be able to see God in it. In everything that we do and say it must bring glory to God.

As I journey back in my campus I plan in intentionally creating a small group to share His words and love to others. I will also start a fellowship with my fellow youth in our church and impart my knowledge in KC.

By acknowledging our flaws and lapses we were able to acknowledge and witness how great and awesome God is, it open the door for me to witness what only He can do.

By my experiences I was molded into a leader that has compassion to others, that seeks to understand what others are going through, a leader who will always accompany other in their journey, whom will provide comfort to those who are in need. A leader who looks at the beauty in imperfections, who sees hope in brokeness. A leader whom shows unconditional love to those who seems to be unlovable. A leader who represents Christ in my life.

To my KCmates may our stories and friendship prosper. Pinangga kay tamo. Ang tanang Dungog ug Himaya sa Diyos lamang.

Photos from IVCF Kawayan Camp